Report No. 5
Usenet Report 5: The Nylon Frontier
I tried to find a manual for the computer today, and actually did. It was, of course,
stored electronically on the computer itself. So, flicking through it, I found a page of
names. Naturally, having worked out that this was a bit more than your normal
run-of-the-mill PC, I was intersted in who had invented the technology used in it. So,
here is a short part of the list:
Chief designer: B.S. Johnson
Chief programmer: Wilma Gates
Chip designer: R McDonald
Communcations systems: The Trappist Group
TSP: P. Stibbons
For more information contact sales:
cmot@dibbler.com[1]
Interesting.... Very interesting...
Newsgroup: misc.last.and.found
LOST: One cranium and various associated elements, human, in vicinity of
Centauri Prime. If found, please leave in location where Za'Ha'Dum
previously was. Reward offered - whatever you want.
--
Mr. Morden, mmorden@icarus.zahadum.com
Newsgroup: drazi..traditions.you.know.what
<9999 * 10^9999 lines snipped>
>>>>>>>Green!!!
>>>>>>Purple!!!
>>>>>Green!!!
>>>>Purple!!!
>>>Green!!!!
>>Purple!!!
>Green!!
Orange!!!!
-----
Q: How do we know Tomb Raider hasn't got a real world physics engine?
A: Lara Croft can stand up...
Mark Dunne, mdunne@iol.ie / http://homepages.iol.ie/~mdunne
To reply, remove the 'nospam'. I never said I wasn't original...
And on the Earth-Alliance's internal network (never mind how I got in...):
CNC secondary targetting systems v10.3.4 has been found to have a bug. The
following fix can be applied:
ftp.ea.gov/cnc/defense/software/fixes/mack1.3.4.5.5.4.3.3.tar.gz
Newsgroup: alt.fan.pratchett
Internal error. Insufficient storage space on local systems. 10^99999 Tb
required to store messages on this newsgroup.
Newsgroup: alt.binaries.misc
> So, if anyone has anythng suitable...
<snip this idiots post>
What? This is a binary group! No text-only messages!
==============
STREET ARTIST file follows
file: asvoice.voc
@"0?54383581 %Ù4©¹@?H
Newsgroup: alt.fan.pakmara
This newsgroup is no longer carried by your server, due to negative message
counts.
Newsgroup: alt.lost.and.found
LOST: Large elliptical curve, story type. Last seen in sector 421. If
found, please post a reply.
This is the last Usenet Report. As you can see these are mainly filler
posts, and most of them not very good. :-(
There may however be a spin-off series: The Usenet Series: IRC
There are also three web sites planned, currently in production, and a
remastered version of Usenet Report 1!
[1] But can anyone find the OTHER cunningly hidden Pratchett references?:-)